gayy_jay on Instagram

Jay

Queer traveller on the adventure of a lifetime. 📍Penang, Malaysia

https://hldlight.com/blogs/hld-light-blog/interview-with-jay

Report inappropriate content

🐙

9

The Little Mer-queer. ________________________________ (The other option for this caption was Finding Homo). ________________________________ #androgynous #androgyny #genderless #nonbinary #lgbtpride #lgbtcommunity #itgetsbetter #tomboystyle #androgynousstyle #queer #fuckhate #loveislove #lgbttravel #lgbttravellers #lgbtqtravel

10

Two things I’m excited about today: 1. We’re heading back to Malaysia next week! We loved KL so much that we decided to change our route and head to Penang for a week or so before we get to Singapore for @chloefairbro’s birthday & Christmas ✈️. 2. The wonderful @hld.light interviewed me about clothes, queerness and travel (and ABBA), and you can read it here (y’all gotta copy and paste because Instagram sucks) hldlight.com/blogs/hld-light-blog/interview-with-jay - OR hit the link in my bio, let me know what you think! 🤷‍♂️. ________________________________________ #androgynous #androgyny #genderless #nonbinary #lgbtpride #lgbtcommunity #itgetsbetter #tomboystyle #androgynousstyle #queer #fuckhate #loveislove #lgbttravel #lgbttravellers #lgbtqtravel #queercouples #gfstandout3 #tomboysww #travelblogger #travelmalaysia

36

Is there anything better than this? ✨

22

Just a Queer who is incapable of wearing any piece of clothing without rolling up the cuffs 💁‍♂️ #thisisqueerculture ______________________________________ #androgynous #androgyny #genderless #nonbinary #lgbtpride #lgbtcommunity #itgetsbetter #tomboystyle #androgynousstyle #queer #fuckhate #loveislove #lgbttravel #lgbttravellers #lgbtqtravel #queercouples #gfstandout3

41

After two months of travelling it felt so, so good to get just a little bit suited up. Feat. my new favourite trousers (or pants for y’all 🇺🇸) that were quite literally made for me in Vietnam. _____________________________________ #androgynous #androgyny #genderless #nonbinary #lgbtpride #lgbtcommunity #itgetsbetter #tomboystyle #androgynousstyle #queer #fuckhate #loveislove #lgbttravel #lgbttravellers #lgbtqtravel #queercouples #gfstandout3

51

There’s something healing about wandering around one of the most famous places in the world with thousands of people from every country you can think of. So many nationalities and languages and cultures all in one place just to appreciate one beautiful thing. It’s easy to forget when you’re defining yourself on a daily basis that you are also, and firstly, human. Which makes you equal to the person next to you, or 5000 Miles from you. ____________________________________ We left Cambodia this morning after a few weeks exploring this beautiful country. It’s a place with such a painful history, but is also a place with the kindest and friendliest people I’ve ever met. If you ever get a chance to go, go. ___________________________________ #androgynous #androgyny #genderless #nonbinary #lgbtpride #lgbtcommunity #itgetsbetter #tomboystyle #androgynousstyle #queer #fuckhate #loveislove #lgbttravel #lgbttravellers #lgbtqtravel #angkorwat #cambodiatravel #southeastasiatravel #travelblogger

10

If you need me at any point during the next few days, I’ll be lost inside a temple somewhere within Angkor Wat.

14

We left Vietnam this morning after spending just over a month exploring this crazy country. It’s entirely impossible to describe it all in a caption, so here’s an early morning coffee/thirst trap photo from our last morning in Ho Chi Minh city. _______________________________________ Where next? This evening we arrived in Phnom Penh in Cambodia, and are spending a day or so here before heading to Siem Riep. Stories to follow, suggestions or hints and tips send them over 💙

28

Today we met Misa. She came over to ask if we were friends, then she winked and asked if we were more than friends, we laughed said “maybe”. She told us about her friends, a gay Australian couple she has known for 5 years, who got engaged last year after gay marriage was legalised, and how she was the second person they told after the man who they bought the ring from. She’s going to their wedding in Hoi An next year. She told us how things are getting better for the LGBTQ+ community in Vietnam, especially in the cities, and how happy it makes her to see people openly loving and living their lives. She took both of our hands wished us luck and love, and said, “keep being happy happy girlfriend and girlfriend” (swipe for us and Misa). _______________________________________ In a world full of so much hate towards the LGBTQ community, it just took one unexpected conversation to shine through with so much love and support. Thank you Misa for reminding us that for every negative voice there are so many more like yours, quietly making the world a better place.

57

We are officially halfway down Vietnam & 1 month into our six month trip! We spent the last few days exploring Hué, Vietnam’s royal capital, and Phong Nha National Park (swipe for an insane view from our homestay). Vietnam is crazily beautiful, and actually just...pretty crazy in general, sights so far have included: 🛵 Dude on a scooter carrying four people sizes ceramic urns, tied on with a rope. 😮 The second largest cave ever discovered (31km, Paradise Cave - check my highlights for photos). The first largest is also here too, but it’s a 7 day $3000 trek to get there so we settled for the second best. ☕️ Egg coffee. Yes, that’s coffee made with egg. I don’t know why. 🐶 A sausage dog called Sweet Potato wearing a bike helmet (he was my fav.) _________________________________________ Have you been to Vietnam? Where did you go & where did you love? Send me your tips! 📸 from our pool day at Indochine Palace Hotel, Hué.

25

A lot of you have asked me how it’s going travelling around South East Asia as an openly Queer/Non-Binary person... _________________________________________ I won’t lie & say it’s been 100% easy, I get stared at A LOT, which gets a exhausting at points, especially when you’re trying to figure out if it’s out of interest, confusion or hostility. Most people assume I’m Male when needing to gender me (bathrooms, hotel staff etc) which, although it gives me some additional protection in Asia, also scares me because it opens up the possibility of hostility if/when that person changes their view. I’ve spent hours avoiding changing into swimwear, or clothing that shows my body, simply because I’m afraid that someone will react badly. _________________________________________ However, there are a few significant things to bare in mind here...firstly that I experience the majority of these things everywhere, in the UK, US, Europe etc. Secondly, I have yet to face anything more than extended discomfort from stares, comments in other languages or concerns stemming from my own anxieties. I haven’t felt threatened or uncomfortable more than I do when in any other part of the world. I guess my point is this: Travelling as a person who is “different” is never 100% easy, whether you’re Non-Binary or Trans or androgynous or however you present, if it’s in anyway different from cisgender heterosexuality you will attract unwanted attention. Research where you are going throughly, take precautions when needed (@megcale has some excellent advice on dopesontheroad.com about LGBTQ+ travel safety) but most of all, don’t let a little discomfort stop you from living your life. It can be super scary to exist in a world where everything and everyone seems to look a certain way and you don’t, but don’t let it stop you. As long as you are keeping safe, you do you 💙 _________________________________________ 📸 - The Citadel in Hué taken by my 😍 @chloefairbro .

32

Goodbye, Luang Prabang. Thank you for the breathtaking views, the waterfalls, the banana pancakes, and for being the most chill place in the world. Sabai, sabai 🌴 Hello, Hanoi ✈️🇻🇳

52

Happy #nationalcomingoutday my wonderful LGBTTQQIAAP family 💙 to those of you who are not out, who are out, who want to come out and who don’t, you are all equally as valid and important. __________________________________________ It is worth it. I promise. It is worth fighting through the problems to be your real authentic self every day. It’s worth going through the tears and the pain to later watch your family or friends meeting and loving your new partner as much as you do. It’s worth the awkwardness and the stress when you finally have the confidence to buy and wear the clothes you really want. It’s worth it when, for the first time you walk out the door or hold your partners hand feeling confident and not scared. Coming out is fucking scary, especially the first few times you do it - BUT - it’s also the first few steps towards really living your life. __________________________________________ This does have a caveat, there may be some people who you just can’t come out to for your own safety and security - that is 100% okay. Always put your safety before everything, and remember if the people around you don’t support you then there’s a rainbow family out here for you instead 💙

63

A rather late #worldmentalhealthday post. Here are 4 things from one Queer/Non-Binary Person/Traveller/Human to another which help me keep myself stable: 1. A crisp button down (or actually any piece of clothing that you really like) can go a long way in helping you feel confident. 2. Ditto a good haircut. 3. Sometimes you will have days where you feel a bit shit. Voicing this to someone will always always always helps (even if it’s scary at first). 4. Your value to the world around you is created & determined by yourself, no one else. ________________________________________ Spent the day overlooking the Luang Prabang mountains reflecting on how lucky & grateful I feel to be here, and how determined I am to enjoy every second of it. What’s your best piece of advice for mental health?

94