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Disney, Breastfeed, Repeat ✨

I keep it real I enjoy empowering women/mothers I make things (including humans) 🔮 mama shop:@themotheringfront disney shop:@magicallypressedco blog👇🏼

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Sometimes I lose my temper and I scream at my toddler. I don’t like that I do this, but I’m only human and thus imperfect. Patience is one of those things I was never very good at. It’s taken me lots of work and dedication to find patience in times when I have none; to teach myself how to conjure it. • You see, before I had my daughter I had a “take me or leave me” attitude. I knew what my flaws were but didn’t give a damn and never made an effort to learn from them. The difference now is that I realized that I have been tasked with raising a member of the new generation. A generation I hope will be kind, understanding and open minded. I want to teach my daughter to be the best possible version of herself...and to do that I have to lead by example. So, I’m working on my flaws. I’m teaching myself patience. I am taking a deep breathe and choosing my words wisely before reacting when I’m upset and I’m now a constantly evolving version of myself. 💜 • Do you mamas have any flaws you’ve noticed since having your child(ren)? Are you working on them in any way? Sometimes saying it out loud, or sharing them with a stranger can really help! . . . . . . #motherhoodclub #momssupportingmoms #tiredasamother #momlifebelike #mynameismama #stopdropandmom #mumsofinstagram #motherhoodlens #momcommunity #motherhoodrising #momentsinmotherhood #lifeasmama #igmotherhood #motherhoodinspired #featuremama #motherhoodunplugged #acupofmotherhood #momlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #uniteinmotherhood #honestlymothering #myhonestmotherhood #postpartum #motherhoodjourney #raisingthefuture

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Parenting when you’re sick feels like torture. Parenting a child that needs to be fasted and checked for blood sugar levels throughout the night (while you’re sick) is actual torture. • I’m still feeling super strange and can’t seem to shake it so today I’m throwing it back to simpler times when we were both happy and having selfie parties all day 💜 #tbt • PS: anyone else notice that pictures with toddlers in them are blurry like 98% of the time?! 🙈 . . . . . #toddlertamer #toddlermom #momcommunity #momlifebelike #mynameismama #stopdropandmom #mumsofinstagram #motherhoodlens #momcommunity #motherhoodrising #momentsinmotherhood #lifeasmama #igmotherhood #motherhoodinspired #featuremama #momlife #selfiewithmama #motherhoodthroughinstagram #honestlymothering #myhonestmotherhood #themotheringfront #minnieme

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Anyone opposed to me scrapping the whole motherhood thing and making this a Delilah fashion blog? I mean, just LOOK AT HER 😍 • We went to endocrinologist today for a consult and I completely fell in love with her. We were going to wait for a few other appointments before making any permanent decisions but watching this Dr interact with and care for Delilah pretty much solidified my choice to go with her! She’s concerned with how severe she was presenting during her crash in the ER and wants us to test her blood while we fast her overnight for a month (going gradually from 4hrs to a full 12hrs) she was very respectful of the fact that we cosleep and nurse through the night but unfortunately we have no choice but to do these tests and wean her from night nursing. The alternative would be a 36 hour stint in the hospital with no food so let’s just say I’m determined to avoid that at all costs. To be completely honest, I didn’t really fight her on the night weaning because at almost 19 months I am definitely ready to set up some boundaries and get some actual sleep for once. I’ll obviously be very understanding and do this very gently but it does have to be done because Delilah’s health is the most important thing. We’ll be starting with 4 hour fasts for the first few night, then going up to 6, 8, 10 and eventually 12. This is going to be one hell of a month! Send us all the strength because baby D is used to nursing to her hearts content starting every night at 1am 🙈 . . . . . #hypoglycemia #nightweaning #breastfeedingmama #igmotherhood #featuremama #acupofmotherhood #momlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #uniteinmotherhood #honestlymothering #childrenofig #babiesofig #stunningbabies #candidchildhood #letthembelittle #darlingmovement #mytinytribe #camera_mama #childhoodeveryday #the_sugar_jar #simplychildren #childrenseemagic #thatauthenticfeeling

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I love this time of year, the magic in the air, the cheerful music and beautiful colors. Something about Christmas time just makes my heart flutter. ❣️ Being a mom and watching this magical season through your child’s eyes makes it even better but we work really hard to teach Delilah that the holidays aren’t just about Santa and presents. This season is about giving, love and family, about spending time together and making memories that will last for years to come. We believe in love, respect, and equality. We do our best to instill these values in our daughter while teaching her how to be empathic and understanding of those around her. Which is why we love these dolls from @rubensbarn so much. They’re handmade, ethically made, and they teach children how to be respectful, empathic humans while helping them learn important life skills like socialization and confidence. Delilah loves her Daisy doll from the EcoBuds collection and she usually spends large chunks of her day reading to her. The act of reading aloud (even if it is just toddler nonsense 🙈) is helping her develop her language skills while giving her a sense of confidence. Thank you, @rubensbarn for sending her a new best friend that is going to be a part of her life for many, many years. If you’d like to get your child their own little buddy, you can use the code KINDERCHRISTMAS18 for 15% off until Dec 31st! There’s also a super fun raffle going on where you input the second doll or accessory you’d like to own in the “messages” section at checkout and you may just be lucky enough to win it! 🤗 • What do you mamas do during the holiday season to remind your babies that it’s about more than just presents? I’d love to know! ✨🎄 . . . . . #Rubensbarn #gifted #lifeasmama #igmotherhood #featuremama #acupofmotherhood #momlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #uniteinmotherhood #honestlymothering #childrenofig #babiesofig #stunningbabies #candidchildhood #letthembelittle #darlingmovement #mytinytribe #camera_mama #childhoodeveryday #the_sugar_jar #simplychildren #childrenseemagic #thatauthenticfeeling #verilymoment #littlestoriesofmylife #momentsofmine

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Coping. We all do it differently. I disconnect. I pretend the problem isn’t real and I focus on everything else. I laugh, I feign content, pretend I’m okay. I make silly jokes and seem unaffected by whatever is eating me up inside. I did it when my dad was dying from cancer, I did it when my relationship almost fell apart, and I’m doing it now, when my child’s health is a big question mark. • We had a follow up with the pediatrician yesterday and she’s concerned it’s something more than hypoglycemia. I showed her the videos of Delilah when she was non responsive and she says her blood sugar would have had to be alarmingly low for her to act that way but it wasn’t...it was within normal limits (for a baby that hadn’t eaten in over 12 hours) just on the low side. So we now need to see an endocrinologist because she is afraid that this is a sign of something more serious. It’s not common for children this young to be hypoglycemic, especially with no family history of diabetes. So, instead of peace for our child, there will be more doctors. More blood tests. Her surgery is postponed until February but won’t happen until we know for sure what’s going on. This is becoming our new normal, and it’s not fair to her. I hope that she’s JUST hypoglycemic and reacts very severely; that it isn’t something worse. • “You’re so strong mama”, my DMs read. Thank you. Thank you for your kindness but you must know...I’m not strong. I’m numb. Disconnected. So fucking scared that I’m living in a state of pretend. Coping. Everyone does it differently; we all deal with our issues in our own way. There’s no inspiring message here, no empowering words. Just an honest mother, vulnerably sharing her soul in a space she believes to be safe. Thank you for every message, every kind comment. It means a lot to me, more than you know. It helps me realize I’m not alone, that’s there are people out there that give a damn about my child and my family. But right now, I’m numb. So I’ll continue to pretend. To act as if I’m not fucking terrified...because my daughter deserves that. She deserves to feel safe and happy and I will give her that, no matter what.

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Delilah never made it to surgery. She woke up lethargic and when we got the the hospital she was non-responsive to stimulation or pain so they rushed her to the ER and ran a bunch of tests. She hadn’t eaten in prep for the surgery so her sugar levels were low but they didn’t match how she was acting, her levels were normal for her not having eaten but she was presenting like if they were severely low. They then thought it was a blockage in her intestines that was causing it. They did an ultrasound and that came back clean so they did a CT to rule out brain bleeds. Everything came back clean and we’re still waiting on some blood work but the DR is pretty convinced that she’s hypoglycemic and going so long without eating really messed her up. Thankfully I advocated for her and fought to breastfeed her until a few hours before the surgery was scheduled or she would have been way worse. From now on if she has to fast for whatever reason she will need to do it in the hospital so she can be monitored and given fluids so her sugar levels don’t drop and this doesn’t happen again. We’re waiting to speak to the surgeon to see what he thinks we should do as far as surgery but we just got the all clear for her to be discharged so we’re just waiting on the nurse to come take out the IV and send us home! • She’s in good spirits and aside from being kinda sleepy still she’s back to her usual shenanigans 💜 One good thing that came out of all this: she’s extremely healthy and all her bloodwork is perfect so no one can tell me I’m killing her by raising her vegan 😉 . . #dermoidcyst #pediatricsurgery #hypoglycemic #raisevegan

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We are only human. As mothers, we like to think that we’re invincible, that our feelings, thoughts and needs aren’t as important as our child’s. Sometimes we’re goddesses that can handle anything life throws at us; but sometimes it’s too much. Sometimes you can’t muster up the strength needed to get through a hard day or a difficult situation. Sometimes you let anxiety creep in and overpower your thoughts. Sometimes, you’re not okay... And that’s okay. • There’s beauty in the struggle. Power in the darkest of times, your strength comes from getting though those tough seasons. Each and every negative experience we have makes us stronger. I’m in one of the darkest seasons I’ve ever been in right now. I’m not okay. I am anxious, scared and questioning myself at every turn of the page. I hate that my child was attacked by our dog and that after finally healing from it, it’s time for her surgery that has been planned for months. She can’t catch a break, and I’m longing for normalcy. I feel sorry for myself and my family that we’ve had nothing but bad luck lately and I honestly want to curl up into a ball and cry. And that’s okay. Through all of this pain and turmoil in my life right now I am trying to find strength. Strength for my daughter, strength for my husband and strength for our family. It’s not easy, I’m not okay...but that’s okay. Time heals all wounds and soon, it will heal mine too. • A quick thank you to my girls, my #momtribe for helping me through this. Some I have known for years, some I’ve met on here, but all have made a positive impact on my life. I can’t stress the importance of a mom tribe enough, mamas. No one needs to go through dark times alone and having a supportive group of mothers who have gone through similar things is paramount in making it through. If you’re like me and you’re not okay right now, that’s okay. Take a breathe, talk to a friend, process your emotions, have a good cry. Do whatever you need to do to right now to stay afloat. You will make it through this rough patch, and you will be stronger for it. I’m telling you this because I, myself need to hear it. Hang in there, mama. 💜 • #mentalhealthmatters #strongasamother

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To almost everyone outside of my inner circle I am “just” a mom. I don’t have a standard job with a fancy title and I don’t get in my car and drive to work everyday. I stay home and raise my daughter which means by default I’m considered “just” a mom. What people don’t know is that I work until almost 2am every day after I put my daughter to bed. I run two small businesses (where I make all of my orders by hand) I run a blog, and not one but FOUR Instagram accounts, all while raising a strong willed child. • Being a full time mom is the hardest job I’ve ever had. There’s no “end” to motherhood. You don’t clock in and out, you don’t get a scheduled lunch break and you don’t get to call in sick or take a vacation when you feel overwhelmed. This is what a typical day looks like for me. I spend my day teaching her, caring for her, playing with her and squeezing in some work when I can (which really means I work while I nurse her because she has a meltdown the second I butt hits my desk chair). This is the part people seem to think is so easy. I mean, she’s a baby, how difficult could it be to hang out with her all day? They don’t account for the meltdowns. The days where I can’t put her down, or when she wants to nurse endlessly. They don’t take into consideration that I not only have to keep this tiny human from killing herself 24 hours a day but I also need to engage with her, teach her and keep her happy and healthy. Raising kids isn’t just watching them grow up, you have to be attentive; you have to be a teacher, a chef, a maid, an inspirational energy, a support system and a safe place. You have to be all those things while also being a wife, a career woman, both, or a single parent who works their ass off to put food on the table each night. You have to shape these little humans into future members of society, mold them to be better humans than you are; that’s a very serious, scary job that should be respected. • So no matter what motherhood looks like for you, don’t ever let anyone tell you that you’re “just” a mom. You’re a damn superhero and you’re one of the most important people in the world BECAUSE of your job title: Mom. 💜

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This Monday I’m trying to be as happy as my little one when she’s running around with a soccer ball 😂 • I’ve actually been able to get a lot of work done today since my daughter is finally playing independently for larger chunks of time! 🙌🏼 • How’s your Monday going so far? . . . . . . #lifeasmama #igmotherhood #featuremama #acupofmotherhood #momlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #uniteinmotherhood #honestlymothering #childrenofig #babiesofig #stunningbabies #candidchildhood #letthembelittle #darlingmovement #mytinytribe #camera_mama #childhoodeveryday #the_sugar_jar #simplychildren #childrenseemagic #thatauthenticfeeling #verilymoment #littlestoriesofmylife #momentsofmine

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First they’re sour 👉🏼 then they’re sweet! Swipe to see my little sour patch kid in action 😂 I hope you guys are welcoming December with all the Christmasy things today! We went to target and will be putting up our tree this weekend 🎄❣️ • What are your weekend plans? No one can say it’s too early for Christmas activities anymore and I’m all about it 🤶🏻✨ . . . . #sourpatchkid #sassytoddler #18monthsgoingon13 #lifeasmama #igmotherhood #featuremama #acupofmotherhood #momlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #uniteinmotherhood #honestlymothering #childrenofig #babiesofig #stunningbabies #candidchildhood #letthembelittle #darlingmovement #mytinytribe #camera_mama #childhoodeveryday #the_sugar_jar #simplychildren #childrenseemagic

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Today marks 10 days since Delilah was attacked by our dog so I figured I’d give you a little update 💜 She’s officially off her antibiotics! Her synovitis is almost done running its course and her limp is minimal. Her face is almost completely healed! She has a pretty bad bruise on the side of her head but it’s getting better every day. The deeper bites under her eye and nose are still pretty visible and will probably leave scars but I’ll take a few scars for her life any day! • Thank you so much to everyone who sent us an encouraging message and support during this time! I’m still working on clearing my DMs but I promise I will get back to each lovely message 😘 • Swipe to see her face every day leading up to the day of the accident, it’s honestly amazing how resilient babies are 😫💜 . . . . #dogbite #babiesareresiliant #mynameismama #mumsofinstagram #motherhoodlens #momentsinmotherhood #lifeasmama #igmotherhood #motherhoodinspired #featuremama #motherhoodunplugged #acupofmotherhood #momlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #uniteinmotherhood #honestlymothering #childrenofig #babiesofig #stunningbabies #candidchildhood #letthembelittle #darlingmovement #mytinytribe #camera_mama #childhoodeveryday #the_sugar_jar #simplychildren #childrenseemagic

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“If someone could come remind my mother that she’s not Annie Leibovitz, but just another mom with an iPhone on Portrait Mode...that’d be greaaaat” -Delilah 😂 No but seriously, it’s been great not having to lug my Sony a5100 around with me everywhere I go and as someone who studied photography in high school and college, I’m really impressed by the new iPhone’s camera! It could be clearer but when used in natural light it’s pretty great and the noise is minimal. • Any other mamas out there professional iPhone photographers?! . . . . . #portraitmode #iphonephotography #iphoneXsmax #babiesdontkeep #littlepiecesofchildhood #watchthemgrow #mytinytribe #theheartcaptured #babyootd #writeyouonmyheart #littlefierceones #nestingly #childhoodunplugged #pixel_kids #childrenofig #babiesofig #stunningbabies #candidchildhood #letthembelittle #darlingmovement #mytinytribe #childhoodeveryday #the_sugar_jar #petitejoys #simplychildren #childrenseemagic

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Soaking in all the sleepy cuddles! So far she has taken two naps (within the same two hours) on her @tokimats and was nursed to sleep for both of them 🙈 Even though her daily routine is all out of whack, I know she needs to rest in order to heal so I’m just following her lead and putting her to sleep in the most gentle way possible. • I don’t even wanna think about how hard it’s gunna be for us to break all these bad habits we’ve created while trying to comfort her...but that’s future Nat and future Roger’s problem! For now, we’re living in the moment and giving her whatever she needs. If that means endless boobie naps, then so be it! All things considered, we’ve actually been having a really good day today 🤗 • How’s your Tuesday going? 💜 . . . . #momcommunity #normalizebreastfeeding #fulltermbreastfeeding #motherhoodrising #momentsinmotherhood #lifeasmama #igmotherhood #motherhoodinspired #featuremama #motherhoodunplugged #acupofmotherhood #momlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #uniteinmotherhood #honestlymothering #myhonestmotherhood #postpartum #motherhoodjourney #honestmotherhood

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Sometimes motherhood can be completely enervating. You give everything you can, you pour all of yourself into your child and are left to feel like a broken, exhausted mess. • Right now, I feel like a shell of myself. I’m exhausted but I can’t sleep, hungry but I can’t eat and scatterbrained as hell. I literally can’t focus on a single task, and I’m finding it difficult to put on a brave face for her. I do it because I have to; I find the strength deep (really fucking deep) down and I use it to push forward and make her as comfortable as I can. But all I want to do is curl up in a ball, cry and feel sorry for us. Sorry for her suffering, for my anxiety and for my husband and his burden of caring for us both. I can’t wait for all of this to be over. For her face to heal and her synovitis to go away so she can have at least a week of peace before her surgery. This child is so strong, so resilient...but watching her go through this is breaking my heart and I don’t know how much more of it I can bear. • My heart goes out to all the mothers of children with chronic illnesses and diseases. I honestly don’t know how you find the strength to continue pushing forward and not breaking down into tears at the end of every day. You are seriously the strongest breed of woman, a force to be reckoned with and an inspiration to us all. . . . . #strongasamother #tiredasamother #momlifebelike #mynameismama #stopdropandmom #mumsofinstagram #motherhoodlens #momcommunity #motherhoodrising #momentsinmotherhood #lifeasmama #igmotherhood #motherhoodinspired #featuremama #motherhoodunplugged #acupofmotherhood #momlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #uniteinmotherhood #honestlymothering #myhonestmotherhood #postpartum #motherhoodjourney #honestmotherhood

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This trip has been one of the most needed Disney trips ever! After that terrible accident we all needed to have some fun and watch our baby light up in the happiest place on earth 💜 • I’ve been doing a decent job of getting my anxiety under control but I still find myself jumping at every little thing and being extra cautious with the baby. I know all these things are normal and it will take me time to get over it but for now I am one nervous mess 🙈 • I just want to say thank you again to each and every lovely soul that sent me support, love and words of encouragement in the past few days. I’m slowly making my way through my DMs and every message bring tears to my eyes because I’ve never been a part of such a beautiful, loving community. Thank you all for being the light during one of my darkest times. #imnotcryingyourecrying #thankful

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Thankful for her today. Thankful for her spirit, her strength and her resilience. ✨ Thankful that even though she had this terrible thing happen to her just two days ago, she’s still a beautiful ray of light. I’m definitely holding her a little tighter today because more than ever, I’m truly thankful for her life. • Wishing you all a very happy thanksgiving 💜 . . . . #happythanksgiving #thankfulmother #mynameismama #mumsofinstagram #motherhoodlens #momentsinmotherhood #lifeasmama #igmotherhood #motherhoodinspired #featuremama #motherhoodunplugged #acupofmotherhood #momlife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #uniteinmotherhood #honestlymothering #childrenofig #babiesofig #stunningbabies #candidchildhood #letthembelittle #darlingmovement #mytinytribe #childhoodeveryday #cameramama #the_sugar_jar #simplychildren #childrenseemagic

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Yesterday afternoon one of my biggest fears became reality. My dog attacked my daughter. He didn’t give her a warning shot, he didn’t just bite her once, he ATTACKED her. He knocked her down, climbed on top of her and bit and scratched her face repeatedly. I scared him and waited for him to let go before pulling him off of her so I wouldn’t cause him to rip her skin off when I pulled him off of her. It happened in seconds. I was in our bathroom packing for our trip and Delilah was playing in our room, running back and forth from the kitchen. I saw her leave the room so I followed to make sure she was within eyesight but within seconds, I heard growling and screaming. I don’t know what happened, if she scared him and he reacted or if he just wanted to hurt her. Either way, he lost all domestication and became a savage, attacking her and going for blood. Had I not been there, he probably would have killed her. He has shown signs of aggression in the past, even bitten several people so I was very anxious all throughout my pregnancy about him hurting her but he always just ignored her. He never really growled at her or got aggressive until about two weeks ago when she tried to take a toy from him and he snapped at her. I should have been more careful after that. I should have somehow expected this could happen, protected her better. She’s doing okay now. All her wounds are superficial and she’s healing well and in good spirits. But I can’t calm down, I can’t find my center. I keep picturing it in my head, him on top of her and all the blood. It’s awful. Every time I see her face I’m reminded that I should have never let this happen, the dog should have been locked up. I know accidents happen but I feel like I should have foreseen this and done a better job of preventing it. 😞 I just never in a million years expected this to happen. So yes, I am blaming myself. I feel like shit and it’s just gunna take me time to be able to accept all this. I know I’m not a bad mother, I know this could happen to anyone... but right now I feel like I failed her and I just need time to work through these emotions. {Continued in comments}

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