I have to be honest. I really struggled living in Vietnam.
It was so different from anything I had experienced before. I moved there having never ever been to Asia. I’m from the United States and you could say our ways of life are a bit different.
I didn’t understand the language, the culture, or the people. I always felt like an outsider to the point that I became frustrated and didn’t try anymore.
My travels looked glamorous and they were incredible. But I was riddled with guilt, longing to be home, a desire to help, and loneliness at the thought I’d never belong.
I thought I was better than others because I went to Vietnam. I lived there. I stuck it out.
That did not make me better. It made me a very miserable person to be around. It made me sad at who I was. It’s like when you know you shouldn’t eat cookies but you keep on eating them. I knew I should stop complaining and actually engage but I just couldn’t.
My goal is to return to Asia soon. To have a new perspective. To be more gracious, kind, and loving to myself, the people, and the culture.
I want to have a fresh start. To really dive in knowing what to expect. And to be a person there I love and am proud of being always.