When I left for Florida I didn’t know what to expect. I was going through a lot before I left, So I was a little scared, I was nervous to see where my thoughts took me. Definitely with leaving all electronics at home, it was almost like I left all my problems with them.
I didn’t expect to get to Florida and my problems just magically disappear. I honestly didn’t know what to expect. And sitting there on the beach every morning in meditation these thought came to my head. The thoughts of did I leave everything at home to run away? Was that what I was trying to get out of this trip?
Maybe that was my plan, to just run away and watch the magic of the beach let everything that had been bothering me since the beginning of the semester disappear with the tide. But they didn’t disappear, they were on my mind most of the week. Some nights I cried as my sister rubbed my back, and other nights where spent laughing and becoming one with these problems, then there were the days that held both of these. It was hard, but it was everything I needed.
These mornings, the mornings where it was just me, the pelicans, the tide, and my mat. These mornings were the hardest of all. But they were what made it all worth it. They showed me my strength, and my magic. It showed me that it takes time. But life isn’t easy, but as long as I stay true to my magic I can and I will make it through.
And now I sit here, these thoughts still running through my head, scared of what’s to come when I get back to St. Louis but I know it’ll be okay. Because I’m strong, and I have the power and the magic to keep myself accounted for what will come.