***(Lengthy, honest post, but let’s be real, when am I not lengthy and long winded?! 😂🙈)
Today was just ONE. OF. THOSE. DAYS
The kind of day where you wake up and are instantly filled with doubt, insecurity, body shaming.
The thing is, I have a bit of an obsessive personality. I start out with good, pure intentions, but then my control and perfectionism rear their ugly head and it’s a slippery slope downhill from there. I find myself eating a certain way with the goal of being thinner and exercising to attain some ideal body image. It never ends well. In fact, it usually ends in me binge eating a bunch of crappy food and writing off exercise for the next year. I get defeated and find myself quitting altogether, and then hiding completely.
I started running again because it makes me feel better-physically & mentally. I lace up my shoes and throw some worship music on. It’s my form of therapy and I’m always better because of it. I promised myself that I wouldn’t turn it into a competition or “body image” thing, that I would use running as a form of worship, not punishment.
BUT. This morning my head thought, “You need to be more thin and tone.”
My spirit said, “NO. We are not going there. Different thoughts. Move on.”
The real victory today is that God is straight up grabbing my mind and placing it on things above. I run and move and exercise because I GET to. I eat certain foods because I GET to. I choose a healthier lifestyle because I feel better, stronger, more equipped to go as far as He’ll go with me, to do the hard, holy work He has ordained for me.
We’re no longer slaves to this world or someone else’s standard of beauty, or the enemy’s lies. And we don’t have to think like it. The old has gone, the new has come so let’s live in the freedom and victory of that.👊🏼💪🏼