I’d say I look a little different compared to the first time I tried this bad boy on..
I’m a little different from a lot of trans guys I’ve met in the way that I don’t often wear my binder. I’ve always had sensory issues about tight clothing. Anything form fitting or a collar that touched my neck could easily send me into an anxiety attack. I’ve gotten a little better about it now, but I only wear my binder on special occasions:nights out on the town, meeting new people (especially first dates), interviews. I pass considerably well when I wear it, it helps my dysphoria when I look down at a considerably flatter chest, but the tightness and the paranoia that it’s uneven drives me up the wall and I can’t wear it for more than a few hours. So I feel kinda like gender Frankenstein’s monster when I go out in public wearing a sports bra, especially to the gym. My muscles have gotten larger, my face more masculine in structure, and I’ve got a little bit of facial hair, but I’ve still got 32 C cups and I get weird looks when I walk into the women’s locker room,when I walk over the weightlifting section, when I go into public restrooms (no matter which one I pick, it never seems to be the right choice) and lately I just feel unsafe. I never posted about it anywhere but I was threatened at work by a customer in the drive through about a month ago, they demanded their food and drinks be remade because they were convinced I touched it, even though I didn’t, and threatened to come inside (to do what, I’m not sure I want to find out). They told the training manager at the time they didn’t want me walking past the window, I wasn’t to look in their direction, and i was told by a coworker to stand to one side until they got their things and left the drive through. Needless to say I was shaken, and furious at both the way I was treated by complete strangers and by the way my coworkers and management handled the situation. You never know when a sour look can turn into a threat, or when a threat can turn into an attack.