writing about fear:
for the first time in my life I am facing the situation of not having a job. of not knowing, how I will earn money to pay my bills. I have no offer waiting for me at home, nor an idea of what I want to do.
and that scares me. a lot!
but I am handling that fear differently this time. it is fine that it is there, I know it, I feel it and I accept it. but I am not letting it taking over my life, not this time. I won’t let it hurry me, I won’t run to the next place and apply for a job that, in the end, doesn’t feel right for me.
I am standing the feeling of not knowing and I take my time to find out, what I am want to do. I want to talk to people, I want to find options and I want to listen to my heart. it is a hard process, and I have to fight the fear down, often and a lot. but that is what I want to do. because I don’t want to feel like I did last year. so I have to stand for myself this time. I believe that it will be worth it. •