MY FAVES FROM TODAY'S ... & a love story.
my most harmful for my trauma & stress was . I topped out at 158lbs. That may not seem like a lot, but I barely scratch 5' on a good day, my healthy weight is between 95-115. I have been hovering around 130-135 for years, with hardly any change. I had a terrible relationship with food. no matter what I ate, I felt guilty. I would look in the mirror, or see pictures of myself and want to cry with disgust. No matter what diet or exercise program I did, it never worked. I couldn't break the plateau so I'd get frustrated and give up. I would get so angry with myself for failing.
I constantly deprived myself of things I loved as a form of self punishment, ya'll... I can be one hell of a petty bitch. 👿.
After a metric fuckton of I realized that I can't hate myself into a version that I'll love, or insult myself into a version I'll respect. A huge catalyst of this came from listening to "you are a badass" by Jen Sincero on @ .( ... dammit)
is a process. it doesn't happen overnight, and I know I still have room to improve, but I am lightyears ahead of were I once was. I still want to lose the remaining 20-25 pounds, but I want to do it BECAUSE I love myself. Because I DESERVE to be the best version of myself. Because I am WORTHY of 👸
One of the many, MANY things that I had been waiting for until "I lost the rest of the weight" was (starting up my was another 😉) So today, I got to start another chapter 📖. .