#transformationtuesday I remember seeing the picture on the right that my dad took and had the nerve to POST ON Facebook 🙄🤬😈 and cringing. Yes, I had just given birth for the 2nd time. Yes, I hadn't slept in probably 36 hours. Yes, I can give myself some grace. But, still...ugh.
The pic on the left I took today after BBG Week 19 (round 2 week 7) Arms & Abs and a shower, at 7 months postpartum, and I'm so proud of my progress these past 4 months.
A couple months into BBG Round 1 a friend said, "you'll be feeling like your old sexy self in no time." (I have kind friends. 😊) My response was, "ha, I'm just going for human." Seriously. I just wanted to feel human. Like, a person. Alive. Maybe even happy if I was getting greedy.
Struggling with depression and rage, being a stay-at-home mom to needy littles, basically zero time to myself, sleep deprivation, being trapped in the [messy no matter how hard I try] house 24/7, barely any adult interaction, not liking what I saw in the mirror...it all adds up and I was very unhappy despite having a seemingly wonderful life. Cue the guilt for feeling that way and you got yourself a nice little shame filled pity party. 🎉
Now I feel like I have some control. Control over my body and mind, my health and fitness, my life and happiness. Even if training is just a small part of the day, its effect on my mindset and attitude is huge. And that helps me get through the rest of the day (day after day after long day 😆). I went through the motions before like a sad little mombot 👩👧👦🤖, indifferent and blah. Now I feel purposeful, even if it's just working out.
The house is still a mess, IG and Snap are still my main source of adult interaction, I still survive on caffeine, and I still don't have alone time. But I'm coming around to what I see in the mirror and I'm handling the rest of the chaos a bit better. Dare I say, sometimes with a smile even!
Thank you @kaylaitsines and your brilliant #bbgprogram for putting me back in the driver's seat 🚗🛣️😎