My Mind 🧠 & My Period ❣ .
It’s been X amount of X since I’ve had a steady/ normal period. And today feels like the first day of “normal.” .
I’ve had the first spotting freakout. Where my ED mind set went crazy thinking. Well this is it?! This is the last step to recovery, and your there. There are many other words floating around that didn’t make me feel the best when it SHOULD have been a win! .
Today, it hit me again. Real HARD.
I’m not sure if this post is a “Need Advice”or “Give Advice” Post.
As I’m in two minds, I want to know if others felt scared as I do, but I also want to let people know I’m okay. I’m okay with not being 100% okay, I’m not changing my eating habits, I’m not feeding the ED behaviours rather than my body. But I also want to let others know, I’m not doing the best. I’ve been struggling for a few days now, but that’s okay. It’s okay to feel the emotions of being restored and recovered, it’s not a loss, it’s not a failure, it’s a win. My ED may not be letting me feel at the moment that it is a win. But it is. .
My body is returning, my life is returning, periods also come with that, emotions come with that. It’s okay not to be okay, there are more better days in recovery than not, there are more days of freedom than not. There are more smiles than tears. But today sometimes my ED tried to rob me of my wins.
But today, another day, I may be scared but I have not let it. .
#recoverywarrior #mentalhealth #recoveryispossible #itsokaynottobeokay #period