‘The trouble is, you think you have time’ - Buddha 💔
This man here, raised me as his daughter for 17 years. He adored Jace, his first little grandson, his ‘little mate’. 2 years ago today I was going about my usual pre Christmas chaos, when I got a call from my mum stressing because they had been trying to contact me, she said Steve had a fall after returning from Christmas shopping that day, and he was in hospital and we had to go. I will never forget the feeling of seeing him laying there, in person but not the Steve we knew, to hear the words that there was nothing more they could do to save his life.
A freak accident, took him away just like that. The day he died we were minutes away from each other, shopping in the same town. The amount of times I thought about saying things to him, but never did. And for two years now I have lived with the guilt, and with the pain, of losing someone and not having said what I wanted to say to him; ‘thank you for all you did, I love you, i miss you, I’m sorry’..or even the chance at goodbye. It’s something that I’m not sure I ever will fully come to terms with, some people will say it’s too late, but I try to live every day believing he’s looking down on us and that he understands.
So what I want to say from this post, is never wait, don’t rely on the fact ‘they will be there’, because moments pass us by before we fully appreciate them. It truly changed me as a person, and the way I live my life. I would give anything for a minute with Steve again.
I hope you’re singing to Sinatra up there with a Guinness in hand. We miss you so much every day. 😢💔 11/12/2016