It was today among the sadness & a heavy heart I resisted the urges to wander, to wander far & find my peace.
I resisted the pull of the deep blue sea filled with mother nature’s secrets.
Disconnected by all the discoveries, the new challenges that awaited this new way of life. New way of thinking, knowing the all known awareness to let go & just be.
The world had somehow listened upon my hearts callings to not give up, to not surrender back into old habits. To not disconnect, although my brain was urging me to do so.
It was when I started listening to the peace within, that I chose to participate in life surrounded myself with people. I chatted to people I smiled at everyone I could see even when I could sense they didn’t know how to react to it.
I looked myself in the mirror & said stop giving up on yourself. Just like that, I broke the pattern. I broke the conditioning of my easy way out. Blamed usually on been too tired too drained from others energy, too tired from not doing enough. Too tired from working and too tired on working on myself. It wasn’t until I stood straight faced myself looked into those confused eyes and in a loving way, said whatever you do, how ever hard it’s going to be I got you!
This time I knew it was true. I resisted all urges drawing me under my own deep dark hole of pity or blaming it on a bad day. I instead owned my shit! I called myself out!
I changed my habit! ....continue next page...