Maybe YOU have a question. I’ve been exploring answers to my own Q’s but maybe you’re asking yourself what the heck is up with me and why have I started this whole writing thing. It’s simple: I’ve been scared. It’s true. Boo! Happy Halloween. Yay October babies. Ghastly Creatures.... ok fine, not that kind of scared. Personal fear. Internal fear. Deep fear. Let me explain: for a while now, I’ve been afraid of my creative voice. Specifically with writing, I always have so much fear with how it will be received. The films. The poems. The blogs. The reviews. The everything. I’m so focused on if it’s good. And what is good. And who is good. And why is good. That I end up making a lot less than I should. Less than I deserve! My self-doubt becomes self-editing becomes self-critique becomes self-sabotage. And boom. I end the day with the same number of paragraphs that I started with - zero triple zero. And I’m tired of it! And PS it’s nobody’s fault but mine. I’ve had a few “monsters” as they’re called (people who critique my work or remind me that it’s not funny or that it doesn’t make sense or, or, or) but those people are overshadowed most of the time by supportive folks. That said, I still focus on the negative, which I am trying so hard to avoid and to change. And I will! So anyway, I started doing this. I started free-writing on these posts and never editing. In fact, believe it or not, I don’t even go back and read these! Today or any other day. Some of you just had the thought of “hmm... clearly”, haha, and that’s ok! The spelling, the grammar, the run-ons, the repetitiveness, the nonsense, etc.- it’s all part of the journey. I write without a form and without an Editor. Without a topic and without a Critic. All in all, my answer to your possible question is, “I guess I just write, because I feel.”
To whoever’s reading this: What’s your story? I’d love to read it.