BULIMIA........a small word? Yes. A powerful word? It depends if you've been affected by it. For me it is. For those around me it is. Bulimia is compulsive, habitual, disgusting, awful but most of all for me it was hell. It made me a person I didn't like. I was secretive, sneaky, a liar, manipulative. These are not characteristics I have now, or characteristics I had in any areas of my life except if eating was involved.
I feel like eating disorders are a taboo subject. We don't talk about them. We talk about obesity enough, what about the other end of the scale? Both are a drain on resources, complications arise from eating disorders so why don't we have as much focus on anorexia, bulimia or ednos as we do on obesity? How many programmes do we see on tv focused on obesity, diets and weight loss? How many programmes do we see about eating disorders?
I am extremely lucky that I have been able to overcome the symptoms and compulsions of bulimia, but it hasn't gone without leaving it's mark on my body forever. I have irreparable stomach damage. That won't ever go. I had a hospital stay recently due to a gastric bleed caused by bulimia. I hadn't purged for 4 years. I still dont. I just have a weak stomach. I live in fear every time I bend wrong or eat something that it will happen again.
If we talk about this subject we may help someone we love to not go through what I did. I am very lucky to be here, lucky I didn't kill myself through purging, I'm lucky that I didn't die during my gastric bleed, I'm lucky that I haven't damaged myself anymore. All I can do now is live with what I have now, but if I can save anyone from being left with the same as me, I would be so happy. Bulimia isn't glamourous or fun or healthy, it really is hell and like being trapped. If you are reading this and going through it my inbox is open. Sorry for the long read but I just want to raise awareness 💖💖💖
#eatingdisorderrecovery #bulmiarecovery #bulimiaawareness #raiseawareness #happiernow #happier #listen #eatingdisorderawareness #talk #talkaboutit #healthiernow #sundaythoughts #sunday #sundayselfie